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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My MIL is 90+ and we are doing all of the care for her.  She is relatively healthy, but she can’t drive anymore and can’t manage her finances so we have to oversee her purchases and pay her bills. [b] We have teens and I wish that this was happening when we had toddlers or preschoolers.  [/b]My teenagers have homework, sports, test prep, etc so they aren’t free to go to MIL’s each weekend with us to handle the things she needs each week.  If they were toddlers, I would load them in the car to go visit and at least we would all be together.  As it stands, my kids will be leaving for college and I feel every hour that I miss.  [/quote]

- Said by someone who has clearly forgotten what it’s like to care for toddlers.

I know your situation sucks, but it would have been much, much worse if this had happened when your children were toddlers. You actually got a (small) blessing that this happened when your children are mostly independent. [/quote]

NP and LOL. Spoken by someone who has no idea what it is to have teens. You think they are independent and you can go on your merry way while they just do their thing? Remember this thread when you have teens . . . you'll be eating your words. [/quote]

I am the Np above. I took care of my stroke ridden FIL (paralyzed on one side) when my kids were 0, 2 for 2 years. In our house with CNA help.

I then helped care for my own Dad recently for the last 2 years who died of Parkinson's with an 11+13 year old.

I was working both times. But dealing with teens/tweens while caring for a dying parent is infinitely harder - the sheer level of how emotionally present you have to be goes up. I have cried so much in the car recently.  Although that could be perimenopause too lol 🤣

[/quote]

Lady, I'm definitely sending you a hug. I went through dying parent + tween/teen. Exhausting.[/quote]

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