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General Parenting Discussion
Reply to "Do you think most athletes were pushed by parents"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I have a DS that is like you're describing. A natural athlete, plays various sports etc. We haven't pushed at all. We're in rec leagues only. He asks to sign up for stuff with his school friends and if we can make it happen, we do. There's this other kid on one of his soccer teams that is not as athletic as DS, and that was very clear a year ago when they were playing together. That kid's dad arranged for a coach to work 1:1 with him. Now, that kid is easily as good as my DS, if not better. I'm sure the kid loves soccer and loves to play! But the parents are making the decision to invest in the "extras" that will make a difference in a highly-competitive area. Now I'm stuck wondering if we're doing the wrong thing by being chill, especially since DS is only 6!![/quote] Good one! I totally thought your post was serious until I got to the last line! LOL[/quote] Why do you think it's a joke? It's not! I don't have illusions that he'll be in the MLS, but I'd like him to be able to play a sport in high school if he chooses. He's not redshirted with a summer birthday, so he's already on teams with kids a year older than he is. It feels like, as a parent, [b]his self-motivation and love of soccer will not be enough. If he wants to be good, he'll need parents (aka us) to start pushing travel, getting individual coaching etc.[/b][/quote] DP. The statistics show if you push and he's not motivated, instead of a high school athlete you'll have a burnt out kid who drops out of sports altogether at 12-13. Be careful. Only go this route if your kid is pushing you to do it.[/quote] Be careful? You think a really terrible outcome is a kid plays for a few years and then quits at 12? I'm not seeing the problem here. It didn't pan out and they threw in the towel and the earliest possibility. I see this as a great outcome for a sport the kid wasn't meant for.[/quote] Sports participation is like an upside down pyramid. [b]Of course kids are going to drop out along the way.[/b] However, in many sports, it is impossible to get to the top if you weren't already in the system at a young age. So it starts with the parent's motivation to expose the kid, then there comes a turning point, around age 12, where the kid has the same drive or doesn't. Many a young gymnast who quit at 12 found success in other sports. My friend was quite successful at NCAA track after 'retiring.' [/quote] As a parent I will not consider myself as having done a good job if my kid burns out. We have our kids in sports for the life lessons (they are motivated, but none of them have the athleticism it also takes to get to the top and that's OK). A life lesson in handling burnout in middle school is [b]not[/b] what I have in mind. It's more like teamwork, sportsmanship, the fact that when you put in hard work you improve but the improvement isn't linear, and resilience. If our kids burn out from being pushed they're going to remember that, not the positive mental skills.[/quote] You’re aware that your kids are not athletes but like most kids they are playing for fun and reasons you wrote. It gets tougher when your kid has potential. How far do you go? [/quote]
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