Reply to How much effort towards your appearance does your spouse expect?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Both DH and I have maintained our weight and try to stay in shape for health reasons. Of course it’s easier for him (he has a very fast metabolism so will drop 10 lbs by cutting out his 11pm snack, I eat sub 1500 calories to maintain).

I dress up to a certain extent for work. Light makeup. Do my hair for events. Weekends I’m in jeans or athleisure unless we go out.

But we are both aging. Less hair, more loose skin, etc. that’s life. [b]We try to do it gracefully and our if respect for each other try to still look clean, fit and well kempt without going overboard or age inappropriate. [/b]
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Yes, I think respect for ones self and spouse has a lot to do with it. [/quote]

But most of these replies don't really talk about "level" of effort.  They are written more like an off/on switch.  I am turning 50 and I put in so much more effort into my general wellbeing now than when I was 25.  I never stretched in my 20s, If I am not stretching everyday, on the third day, my muscles get sticky and it's hard to move.  I didn't wear much makeup at all in my 20s and I lived in sweatpants when i wasn't at work (ahead of the times, I say!).  But now my features are fading, sweats look slovenly not cute, so I spend time putting on makeup, picking good clothes.  Unlike the Judgy Lady above, I think it takes so much more time for me to get to a good base level each day.  So for now, I am keeping up everything but it's a lot of time so I can see why someone gets to a certain age and wants to reclaim that time back for more pleasurable things.

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+1. OP here and I relate to this sentiment. I would like to have that time back and the mental space. So much mental energy goes into planing what to eat, counting macros, working out, meal planning, hair, make up. I’d like to lean out. Not care as much.

Despite weight gain, DH and I have a regular sex life.  Just wondering if other women and loosening up one their regime as well. [/quote]

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