Reply to Relocating in Retirement

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Spend vacation time in that area, if you haven't already.  When you retire try to plan renting as someone has suggested.

FWIW we retired to a typical neighborhood community and loved it at first. Neighbors were diverse and everyone was friendly. There were several other retired couples around we became friendly with. We knew people's kids and pets and would have occasional social events where everyone was invited.

Then as people moved out and as new people (mostly younger families) moved in the level of neighborliness has changed significantly and not for the better.

We don't even know the names of most of them as they avoided introductions and made it clear they are not interested in any interaction with "old" people who are not in their peer group. Even friendly waves as they drive by often go unresponded to. They have social gatherings at our community space but it is only for younger families with kids, and the middle-aged or retired people are not invited anymore.

We have friends who moved into an active 55+ community and they seem to be doing better.  They have a peer group, there are activities they can choose to partake in and they have made friends they can rely on if they need it - taking in mail, watching each others pets, helping each other out during medical crises, etc.

We have none of that in our neighborhood now. It makes it much less appealing.

Agree with others that you CANNOT plan your retirement years around where your kids/grandkids are. They have their own lives and they very well may be mobile. You cannot afford to pack up and move every time they do, and you cannot expect they will spend any significant time visiting you if it involves travel.

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Sometimes I wonder if my neighbors think this way about us.  Not waving or stopping to say hi on the way to the mailboxes or when they're outside is rude so I won't try to excuse that because we always say hi.  On the social stuff, we have young kids and honestly we don't do a lot of social stuff other than occasional playdates with other young children on the weekend.  We're outside so you're welcome to come say hi and chat (some of my neighbors do, most don't) and the kids will probably be excited to see someone different and I bet they'd love to play with you but most of our neighbors aren't interested in that, not that I blame them.  During the week, it's really rushed getting the kids off to daycare, working, getting them home and fed/bathed/bedtime and once that's over we really just want to watch TV.  [/quote]

GMAFB. You’re too busy to talk to older neighbors bc you have kids? Seems like you’re just self absorbed and rude. Seems to be the new normal for people. Too bad. We’ve always included our elderly or older neighbors, or patients of our friends. And are better for doing it- hearing their stories, seeing them enjoy being included etc. . [/quote]

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