Reply to Marriage not great-taking 5 day trip with DH to work on it

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Reply to "Marriage not great-taking 5 day trip with DH to work on it"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, he may be neurodivergent and/or deeply traumatized. It sucks not to have the partnership that you want, but consider that his passivity, people pleasing, etc. might be maladaptive coping mechanisms and he is too scared to be authentic with you, therapists, doctors. It's a very hard place to be. If he is indeed ND, he may have been punished to things he couldn't help as a child and being undiagnosed never got any supports or understanding of his profile, or peers he could relate to. Dissociation from reality might be his "safe place".  I don't have any brilliant advice, but if you're chosing to stay with this person, have some compassion and meet them where they are.[/quote]

Most likely his whole family is on the spectrum and never talking, never being affectionate, never understanding life is unfortunately their normal. They just stay in and watch screens, never conversating nor planning much ever.  They can tag along with others when asked, but run out of gas after a day or two if that. [/quote]

Op here. Omg I’m an idiot. You said HIS family lol. Yes, your description of his family is spot on.[/quote]

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