Reply to Disagreement regarding telling our kids we are divorcing

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You aren’t a good parent if you want to unload your anger at your spouse on a 10 and 13 year old child by telling them things about your marriage that they are too young to be burdened with. Regardless of what went down in your marriage, if your wife isn’t physically, psychologically or sexually abusing your children then you should be encouraging and fostering a loving relationship between your kids and their mom.

The fact that you would start this thread and ask this question tells me everything I need to know about why your wife sought love elsewhere. I’ll pray for your kids that you behave like a mature adult and shut your mouth about your wife’s infidelity. There is a time for your kids to know and it’s not for about a decade.

Take a parenting class. Read a child development and psychology text. Become a better man and parent than you are right now today. This is not about YOU. Put your kids first.[/quote]

You are an even worse parent if you blow up your children's lives by destroying the bedrock of their stability via cheating. [/quote]

NP.  Yes, the cheater is the worse parent.

However, the cheated-on spouse is still a really terrible parent if he or she gives the kids an inappropriate level of information in order to punish the cheating parent.

OP, your kids deserve at least one parent who is putting them first. Be that parent. You’re not protecting her, you’re protecting them. Find something honest to say that doesn’t put the burden of your adult relationship on them. Please, please talk to a therapist. You have a tough road ahead of you, and you deserve the support and guidance… And your kids deserve a dad who is able to focus on them and not his own pain. That will  be much easier to do if you have outside support.[/quote]

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