Reply to I hate the mentality that college admissions is creating

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This is a "you're both right" situation.

Getting imperfect grades year after year may very well knock out the T10 or maybe T20 schools. If those are what you mean when you say "competitive colleges". Unless your kid is hooked.

I remember one AO saying, "listen kids, don't fret - one B is fine".  He meant 1 B over 4 years.  Or three years - 9th grade doesn't really count.

It's like saying a 95% on the SAT is great - it is.  But it's also a 1410 and it's not getting you into Yale.

Best you can do is talk up some schools that make sense for all smart kids with Aish averages.  When you hear a kid got into Princeton, say, "That's awesome. They're going to have so much fun".  When you hear a kid got into Syracuse, say, "That's awesome. They're going to have so much fun."

Because that's true!  Set the tone, it will be fine, And picking the easy teacher sometimes is fine too.  high school is hard these days[/quote]

This.  Also, there's always grad school.  Always wanted to attend an Ivy for undergrad, didn't get in.  Then I worked after undergrad did really interesting things and guess what?  Got into a top Ivy for graduate school, but it was the right program for me.  There are many great universities and programs not in the T10 or T20.

[b]I would also look into moving your child to another HS.[/b] Is this kind of mindset good for them?  Is this part of the mental health issues that are impacting young people today?

My BIL went to random state schools because that is where he got aid.  Went to law school too, again, at schools most people wouldn't know.  He is incredibly successful.  He worked hard, and knew what his end goal was and got there without some degree from a T50 school even.  He is first generation, but now he is pressuring his kids like crazy.  He says his oldest must get into MIT and keeps pushing that kid (in elementary).  It makes me sad that this pressure is coming from everywhere.  My nephew was asking me about my time at graduate school and I told my nephew there are plenty of other schools and programs and he should decide where to go and his dad came over and goes, "no, he is getting into MIT."

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The great thing about grad school, at least for PhD programs, is that admissions is less about BS factors and crafting an image to sell, and more about demonstrated competence. Did you excel in the area you want to study? Did you make an effort to become involved in research? Do you understand the field and read enough literature to have a meaningful conversation with a potential advisor?

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