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[quote=Anonymous]Op here. I’m really confused about some of the things that have been assumed here. Specifically things that have been repeated as if I said them when I didn’t?

For example: the friends I hang out with are all other married women. And they are not talking about having affairs or doing anything else crazy. I’m not sure at all why multiple posters keep mentioning that 1. There is a man involved. 2. That these friends are pushing me to do crazy these things to ruin my life. On the contrary-these are probably the most stable/normal friends I have ever had.

Also-when I am talking about wasted years I am certainly not implying the time having/raising my kids have been wasted. I’m talking about the time before that. Obviously I didn’t make that clear enough as multiple posters have mentioned that is what I must be referring to.

Also, the Multiple posters that have said I must be manic, that I clearly have mental illness like my mother etc…honestly do you not think I have spent my entire life monitoring myself because of this fear? It makes me think you have never known a child of a parent with mental illness. I have been to many a NAMI meeting and can tell you that this is something I have watched for my entire life. And also-these are feelings. I haven’t “done” anything.

But anyway, those of you have said everyone has regrets and that I have what many people want and that I should be grateful is true. And I do try to remind myself of that. I know I don’t have a bad life. I never said that I did? I just don’t like feeling like I have grown and all the sudden my husband feels like he needs to keep me down. And maybe he is scared. Because I had low self esteem pretty much our entire relationship until recently and clearly he liked it like that. And I do push back. And he just kind of shakes his head and walks away. I guess we will see how it all plays out.[/quote]

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