Reply to DD claims I'm "ruining" her life

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Here's something I realized with my kid, every time they are trying to make their point heard, I say they are whining or complaining.  They are at the age where they are entitled to have opinions.  You are objectively ruining her social life. [/quote]

Inability to text is not the end of the world for kids who see each other on school and presumably the child can be reached through some other means.  Facetime on iPad?  Parent's phone for emergencies?

It's good for kids to understand first world problems are not ruining their lives.[/quote]

Did you post this from your phone? Or did someone take dictation from a live meeting? [/quote]

Obviously I posted from a phone.  So what! I am a PP who recommended waiting.  My kid got himself into a bit of a jam when he got his cell phone in spring semester of 8th grade.  Nothing too horrible but the school counselors got involved and I didn't appreciate the drama. I also think my kids are a bit too sucked into their phones now. But boo hoo, they "need them" now for homework and logistics, so it's even harder to pry the phones loose as they get older.

I am an adult.  I know what kids text about.  I also know that a real friend makes accommodations to include friends whose parents are less permissive.  For example, I was chill with it when my ultra-religious school friend's mom called my mom and interviewed my mom thoroughly about the nature of my 16th birthday party. My friend was super-embarassed about it but I viewed it as acceptable.

If somebody misses out on 6 months of random Youtube links and vacation photos and in-jokes, it's definitely not that big a deal.  It's just not. These kids are together 5 days a week. Sometimes in extracurriculars with each other.  Probably they all have school-issued Chromebooks and e-mails.

My younger child used video gaming and video game chat before he had a phone.  That's another possibility.

It just is not that hard to call a phone that belongs to someone in the household and ask to talk to whoever.  It's really not.  I'm sure this sounds weird and difficult, but it's like dialing a telephone with a rotary dial.  Seems weird now but was not hard to do.[/quote]

14 year old girls are not just sending jokes and YouTube links. Texting is how they make plans. Not letting a 14 year old girl have a phone absolutely hinders her social life.

It seems like some of your points reflect your own growing up, which is so much different than what the norm is now. Kids just don’t talk on the phone as much as text now. And yes, they are in school together but if the OP’s school is anything like my kid’s, then she doesn’t really see her friends during the day because it’s so big.

Finally, making a kid call a phone that belongs to someone else is fine for a 10 year old. It’s pretty extreme for a 14 year old. If one of my DD’s friends called my phone to talk to her I would be really annoyed. [/quote]

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