Reply to Dealing w/aftermath of unfaithful husband and family

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My family member went through a very ugly divorce with very young kids. As long as you prioritize their well-being and don't allow them to see you personal issues w/ each other, they won't be as emotionally-damaged as if you wait until they're older and understand sex/relationships/betrayal and can see the hate you have for one another.[/quote]

But some women come out of the divorce far better and have zero regrets. I don't think it's possible to anticipate how it's going to be.

I've never been in this situation, but there was a time when I considered divorce. It's interesting because I think the outcome of a divorce would have been much better earlier in my marriage. The kids wouldn't have been as negatively impacted by it (they are adolescents now and it would destroy them), I could have gotten back into my career more easily because my mommy gap would have been shorter and I wouldn't have had to deal with age discrimination, and I was less emotionally mature so staying married would have been more emotionally taxing than getting a divorce. So it's possible that divorce seven years ago would have been the right move, and divorce now would be the wrong move. The cost-benefit analysis of divorce isn't static.

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