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[quote=Anonymous]Once I was an adult, my mom sat me down and said our relationship was now a two way street - I needed to be supportive of her / reach out to her / show care for her if I expected the same from her.  I believe a lot of women get this message with or without their moms being so explicit about it.

I see so many men never evolve from the parent / child relationship and I blame the parents.  If they continue to endlessly coddle their sons, then of course their sons will never think about their (the parents) needs or how to be there for their parents.  I have 3 boys and no girls and am doing my best to raise them each with the mindset that we (family / people we love) take care of each other, that love is an action - not a passive thing you just say, that its important to think about how we support other people and be a good friend / family member etc.  And I'll have the same talk with them some day that my mom had with me.

Dh talks to his parents a lot but doesn't think at all about his parents needs.  They've so oriented around they (his parents) take care of him and never want to "burden" him that he has such a blind spot to them as people that might need their only child's support. its going to get very messy as they age and they continue to hide things from him and he continues to be blind to them as anything other than people that take care of him[/quote]

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