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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I totally identify with this post. I can’t believe when he walks into a room he can’t see the situation and what needs to be done. 20 years of having to give OBVIOUS instructions really grates. When I proactively ask him to do something, I can be met with “Yes of course I was going to do that” but if I don’t there is a really good chance it doesn’t happen.

Getting ready for a holiday meal is a great example: I have to step by step give him tasks all day in prep: put leaves in the table and add the extra chairs, get ice and extra soft drinks from the store, set up the cheese plate. He does consistently set up the bar without asking. But several times a year I’m asking him to set up the table, get the ice - like it’s all new to him. And it makes me edgy because meanwhile I’m prepping and cooking in the kitchen and then have to assign another task when he comes in and says he did the table leaves, now what (okay, table pads; good job now do the chairs; great - please put ice in the glasses and pour the water) - why can’t he just do all these things without asking?[/quote]

OP here and I don’t think this is the same at all. My husband 100 percent knew what to do. He is capable of getting the kids out the door more or less on time. To be honest the more I thought about it the more I think think I’m about 25 percent angry about the actual failure to make sure we made it to the appointment and 75 percent angry that he didn’t take responsibility for messing up and instead tried to turn it on me that he can only be expected to do these simple, routine things if I am either not there or specifically request him to do something. I am even more angry that he said something to that effect in front of our daughter.

Last night I was too drained for a major conversation but I apologized for yelling and he apologized sort of generally too. I think we need to have a bigger conversation over the weekend though. [/quote]
You 1000% need to have a conversation with him. [/quote]

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