Reply to 13 year old dd and CPS

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Cancel the phone. Send her to live with her dad. [/quote]
Yes, add abandonment to the abuse. Every girl dreams of having a mom who gives up on her.[/quote]

Come on. This is not abuse.

I don’t hit my kids but I occasionally witness some totally unacceptable behavior and the kids could absolutely use a slap or spanking. I have one friend who screams, yells, hits, scratches and throws things at her family. The parents ask nicely for her to stop since yelling at her doesn’t work. I couldn’t help but think that if this girl threw food at me or purposely spilled soup or milk on the table, she would get severely punished. She is the one kid that I think a good old fashioned spanking would do her good. Of course I have never said this. [/quote]

I'm 48 years old. When I was 13 (back in the late 80s) my Dad slapped me for talking back.  It broke my tooth.   I now have a cap, but it's never really looked right, so every single time I see myself in the mirror, it reminds me.    I also occasionally (2-3 times a day) get a throb of pain in that tooth for a few seconds.    More than thirty five years later.
No one can "use a slap" and the effects can last a life time.  [/quote]

I am so sorry this happened to you. I can not imagine the force it took to break your tooth.  [/quote]

Thank you.
My Dad claimed he really didn't hit me that hard.  That he must have hit the tooth "just right."   It's my front left tooth, so it's really prominent and visible. 
My mom was out of state visiting family and this was in the morning before school.   My dad called my mom and told her what happened, and they "let me" stay home from school that day (while they figured out what to do...)
When my dad took me to the dentist later that day, they told me to tell the dentist that I had been roughhousing with my younger brother and that's how it broke.    They knew the dentist would be a mandated reporter.   So that's what I did and I guess the dentist believed me.[/quote]

pp with the broken tooth here again.

Oh, and this part.   Sometime  after this happened, my mom told me that she and my dad went to a counselor/parenting class and told the counselor what happened.  She said that when they told the counselor about how I talked back that the counselor said "Yeah, I would have slapped her too!"
I honestly don't remember exactly how I "talked back"/what I said (I know I didn't use a swear word.)   I don't know if my mom was lying that the counselor said that, or if there really are/were mandated reporters out there agreeing that it's ok to break children's teeth.[/quote]

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