Reply to Husband decided to keep kids home today without talking to me

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Team Husband! I can’t believe you wanted to send a (mildly) sick child to daycare on a day when schools are closed for extremely low wind chills. That’s just cruel. [b]What kind of person would do that to a child?[/b][/quote]

One that needs time without kids at home to work to a level that guarantees she will be able to keep her career and, perhaps, advance to a bigger salary, which she will need once she can no longer tolerate her abusive, controlling husband.  That's what kind of person sends her kids to daycare when daycare is open.

OP, the stomping, the yelling at you, putting you down in front of the kids, slamming doors, giving you the silent treatment, etc.  All of it is abusive.  That it is happening in front of your kids is worse. Your husband is teaching them by example that such behavior is normal, and you are teaching them by example that they should accept being the recipient of such behavior, even from someone they love.

The kind of abuse your DH is engaging is "coercive control".  It is threatening or intimidating behavior designed ultimately to condition you to be meek and obedient to avoid fights and aggression.

As bad as your DH's behavior is, he is right about one thing - you need individual therapy.  Your husband has told you he is not going to therapy, and he is not interested in changing his behavior.  Your only choice is to go to therapy, and work on yourself and the life you want to build with your kid.  You need a professional to help you figure out how to do that with or without him.

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