Reply to DW acting as if nothing is happening during divorce mediation

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Is there a reason you have not moved out?

Who knows what is going on with her but I personally would not be able to deal with this, emotionally. If my spouse unilaterally wanted a divorce, with no effort at counseling, I'd get out of there and be polite but use the "gray rock" strategy towards her otherwise.

It may be that she has a mental illness or does not have relationship skills and asked for divorce and now sees no way out of it. It may be that she wants a divorce and would prefer to be just friends with you and is ignoring how devastating this is for you.

Who knows, but I'd be out of there. People do occasionally remarry. But right now she gets to "divorce" you without actually having to emotionally detach from you, and you don't seem to be making it clear to her that this detachment is necessary. [/quote]

maybe i missed it but

A) WHY does/did she want a divorce?

B) WHY does she not want to do solo or couples therapy?  (My reason had been married to an abusive narcissist who lied to doctors and therapists point blank, even about his Dx's. But I told him: No, No more therapy with an abusive person.[/quote]

Not Op but the reason is irrelevant and no one wants to do therapy once they have decided they are done. [/quote]

Well then. I’ll assume she has a valid, well thought out reason. No one divorces as a fluke or random reason. In fact most cases it was a couple years of personal deliberations [/quote]

It is usually not one reason. And the reason or reasons are irrelevant and yes, it takes years to pull the trigger. No reason for couples therapy.[/quote]

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