Reply to How cruel is parents not paying for oldest children's college, yet paying for the youngest?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]FIL paid fully for some of his kids to go to college and not anything for others.  What some might not know is that the ones he paid for had to go to the college that FIL chose and no, it wasn’t the same for each of them.  DH was one of the ones who said no and had to pay his own way.  He doesn’t regret that choice.  [/quote]

Most parents who pay for college have some say in the college, why wouldn’t they? Naive teen vs an elder with life experience and the intelligence to have six-figures with of liquid capital. Dad probably knows a thing or two.[/quote]

My husband is now 50 years old.  He said his upbringing was all about control issues and he doesn’t regret his choice to do his own thing.  He didn’t speak to his father for over ten years. That’s the other side of it.  It wasn’t about the tuition. It was about a father trying to have control and not respecting a teen and then a young man’s choices and trying to give too many ultimatums.  [/quote]

I get it. However, as someone with a lot of student loans, I assure you if a parent or rich uncle offered me free college only if I attended university A B or C I would have eagerly accepted the deal. Most low and middle class teens would do the same.[/quote]

I understand that too.  In DH’s situation, he wanted to move away.  His siblings were able to but his father thought he wouldn’t do well in college and only offered to pay for him to stay at home and attend the local state school.  It would be the equivalent of if siblings were able to go to the fancy private out of state but he had to live at home and attend Mason.  He said no thanks and moved out on his own for a few years.  Not everyone would make that choice but I understand his reasoning too.  [/quote]

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