Reply to Would you judge - pacifier at bed time.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My 5 year old still drinks a 5oz bottle of milk at night. I realize he’s way too old, but he likes it. It takes him less than a minute, so I doubt it is doing much harm to his teeth. And he brushes after.

I wouldn’t worry about the paci if the use is as minimal as you say. Let them move on when they’re ready.[/quote]

Whaaaat.

You people are nuts! Are you having a hard time letting go of the baby phase or something? [/quote]

My guess is the mom is reinforcing the nighttime bottle habit by making it a positive part of the routine. The kid probably doesn’t care about the bottle but just knows “mommy likes to give me a bottle.” There is definitely something off about a parent who cannot draw a reasonable boundary like this - likely they are overall an extremely permissive parent and don’t provide any disciple or structure for basic things. That said, I echo a PP who said there are worse parenting practices. Extreme permissiveness may not be that bad for kids who can on their own learn to adapt to the challenges and rules that they face outside the home at school etc. Maybe for some personalities the lack of structure at home lets them develop their independence. But could be detrimental for other types of kids particularly if they are not learning skills and if the permissiveness has developed to accomodate anxiety or defiance. [/quote]

I'm the PP directly above you - and also the one who referenced "worse parenting practices."

Giving a small bottle as part of a five year old's bedtime routine, when it's brief, followed by teeth-brushing, and the parent *knows* is less common for that age is NOT "extremely permissive" parenting.  Not even close.  To me, it suggests a parent who may give in on this issue because they know what boundaries truly are important to hold, e.g., brushing teeth right before bed, and which are not, e.g., a small comfort that harms literally no one.  You're making a crap-ton of assumptions based on one brief post.

If the OP really cares about being judged, that's their business.  Judging someone for something doesn't make anyone an expert in that topic. [/quote]

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