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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]As I’ve gotten more senior in my career (former Biglaw), I’ve realized that all the striving leads to a dead end.  We have enough money now to sustain our relatively modest life. I ask myself whether I want my kids to follow a similar path.

In other words do they bust their butts to do well academically, work in a high-pressure, thankless job, and then get disillusioned with their lives thus far?  Or do they take the long view even from high school, and realized that a balanced life, well lived is better than a high-achieving burst that burns out after 15 years.

And I’m also Asian, second generation American with parents who grew up in a country with a national test for college.[/quote]

"We have enough money now to sustain our relatively modest life" is key here. Median income is 70K in the DMV. Would you be happy with 70K? Or is 200K+ your definition of "relatively" modest?

If my DC didn't have to "strive" to guarantee themselves an UMC lifestyle, let me know how to achieve that.  I do know many "nonstrivers" from my high school that are struggling with their bills and dealing with much more stressful LMC and MC problems, rather than DCUM's relatively banal UMC problems.[/quote]

DP here. Both DH and I went to T10 universities. We also have advanced degrees, one from an Ivy and one from an elite scientifically respected university. We both went through the stress of it all (from our own choosing), and so I think we can safely say the elite grind is not worth it if all you care about is a UMC income. All you need is a reasonable amount of self-drive, decent grades in school, some reasonable social skills. It also helps to have parents who are somewhat connected or who can give you guidance. There are so many people who are doing equally well financially or who are better off financially than we are, and who did not go to elite colleges or work their butts off to get there. Looking back, I probably would have made different choices, and would encourage my DC to prioritize work-life balance.

There is a nice middle of the road option between non-striving total slacker and overly driven.[/quote]

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