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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have what I would describe as an unequal relationship with my husband of 20+ years. He has always been the dominant one and has pressured me a lot over the years to agree to things I didn’t want to do. These included buying an expensive house; using an inheritance I received to pay for a home remodel; and now, he is pressuring me bigtime to sell this house and move 1000 miles away.

I do NOT want to move but I’ve gone along with it because he wears me down with his arguing, pleading and guilt-inducing statements. Now we are at the point of getting ready to put the house on the market and I want to vomit. I don’t want to move. I don’t think I even want to spend the next 20 years with him. When I think of a happy future, he’s not in it.

I have to tell him tonight that I don’t want to move, and this is going to lead straight into what’s probably going to become a divorce conversation. I don’t feel ready to tell him this but I am now backed into a corner. I have  no time to find a therapist where I could deliver the news in a neutral setting.

Any advice on how to stand up to him and have this conversation? I’m so anxious I can hardly breathe.[/quote]

Be a reasonable adult and dissolve this partnership amicably to part ways. Find an attorney and file for divorce. [b]You don't need a therapist to hold your hand,[/b] ask PCP to prescribe an anti anxiety medication for this phase of life. You can rent a furnished studio until you guys sell house and then buy a condo of your own.

That being said, do know that grass isn't greener on any side so make a logical decision not an emotional one triggering by sale and relocation.[/quote]
I’m already on several anti anxiety meds because being around him stresses me out so much. As for delivering the news in a therapist’s office, it’s not “hand-holding.” It’s probably the only way I can do it. This isn’t a reasonable, calm person we’re talking about here. [/quote]

The communication you need to have is your attorney serving him with papers. You may need to have a restraining order handy to file. Life is going to get SO much better for you down the road, OP.[/quote]

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