Reply to "Your spouse should handle the ILs" Why?

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Reply to ""Your spouse should handle the ILs" Why? "

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]So you expect your husband to negotiate plans and tell your family when you will and will not visit. And your husband also plans food to make and gifts to buy for your family while you just sit back and chill? .[/quote]

OP here.  Not sure what you are trying to say, but.....no.  Never said anything like that.[/quote]

Then get out of the dark ages. [/quote]

What do you mean?[/quote]

Np. 
I assume all the PPs saying the flipped examples are highlighting your misogynistic gender-first approach and to communicating with Inlaws. Where mommy and wifey do everything for everyone. And barely get a thank you. [/quote]

So me questioning why some people seem to be saying that one spouse should never deal with the inlaws translates into me saying that I believe the woman in the relationship should always be the one to handle everything with the inlaws?

It is misogynistic, for example, for me to talk directly to my MIL when she has done or said something regarding my kids?[/quote]

Is this Op again? Still trying to argue with people, whilst speaking in extremes again?

Your original question has been fully answered, and quite consistently.

If your MiL does something you don’t like or approve of, with your kids, you AND you husband need to speak up. First whomever is around right then and there, second by the bloodkin. United front. Consistent. He knows his mother. All the stuff posters already explained to you. [/quote]

No, not trying to argue, asking a question.
And what is the speaking in extreme that I am doing?  Can you point it out?

What I see:
I asked a question to understand perspective.
Somebody responded assuming/asking that my own husband does everything for my family while I "sit back and chill" 
I said no and didn't understand the assumption.
I was told to "get out of the dark ages"
I asked what that meant
I was told I had a "misogynistic gender-first approach and to communicating with Inlaws. Where mommy and wifey do everything for everyone"
I asked what was misogynistic about the question and offered an example of a (not at all extreme situation"

And I'm the one that is arguing?  The person/persons in this exchange were the combative insulting ones, no?[/quote]

Your questions have been answered, repeatedly. Why are you so intellectually rigid? Do you often struggle to read social cues?[/quote]

They have, and I have found some of the answers helpful.  I have new questions about why certain posters feel the need to characterize/insult/make sweeping generalizations about other posters.  I'm curious about that too.  But I'll save it for another post.[/quote]

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