Reply to How can I explain to good friends who don’t understand SNs why a weekend trip is not possible for my kids

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Reply to "How can I explain to good friends who don’t understand SNs why a weekend trip is not possible for my kids "

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Thank you for the replies. My husband is adamant I not share the diagnosis with friends. He says it’s none of their business, it’s deeply personal information that we cannot control once shared, and he doesn’t want judgement, pity, or any sympathy from people who don’t get it. He also doesn’t want the kids being judged. [/quote]

Hi OP - I say this very gently and lovingly (hard to convey online...) but this sounds more like something your DH needs to work on within himself. Unfortunately, not opening up to people you know and love, and that love you in return, will result in 1) isolation and 2) no opportunity to affirm that people ACCEPT you and your kids and your/their needs. Refusing to disclose diagnoses may also limit pathways for therapies and supports you didn't know where available to you.

If your closest friends judge you, they are not your friends, and it was bound to get in the way of the friendship at some point. They probably already know.

That said, I don't think you have to go on any trip that is truly horrible and stressful for you. Maybe you could organize a day trip that works for YOUR family, and invite others to come along. That way, you have some safe places/situations for your kids already planned out, and the others are coming along for the fun.

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