Reply to Feeling friendless and unlovable. I am always the initiator. I feel sad.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am so tired of friendships and family relationships that feel unequal: of being the one who books the family's summer VRBO with barely a thanks, who arranges the birthday dinners for friends, who sends the text to the friend who's been quiet for a while ... with crickets on the other side.

I don't know what to do. I am 40 and can't completely find a whole new set of relationships. I just can only assume that I'm not that "worthy" or desirable to be around.

Just today, I reached out to a friend I hadn't seen in a while saying, Miss you! I'd love to get together soon. The friend replied, "Me too!" and then...nothing. Am I supposed to then arrange a meetup for the 100th time?

I just can't any longer. I apologize for posting this on DCUM. I just don't know what to do or where to begin (or end) with this.[/quote]

I'm in the same boat. ALWAYS the initiator. It's so frustrating. I wish people reciprocated more and understood that, when you don't, how it makes other people feel.

I've stopped initiating with some people. I'm just tired of it. And some of those relationships have fallen away. And while I'm sad about that, they've also communicated where I am in terms of a priority for them. So, I also feel like a weight lifted, in some ways. [/quote]

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