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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It will get worse.  We have activities around the clock.  They are 11 and 13.  You will get sucked in... so brace yourself. [/quote]

This is a choice!

Not all of us make this choice.[/quote]

Yes and no. We are not a super scheduled/programmed family and have never signed kids up for activities just because. But as kids get older, I’ve realized that a major reason activities are such a big thing now (as opposed to when we were kids) is the way school has changed. School is more academic, with far less sports and arts, especially in the elementary grades. There is also less time for socializing, with shorter recesses and lunch and less free time in the classroom.

So what I used to see as optional or overzealous in terms of after school activities, I now view differently. Fir younger kids, it’s fine for them to just be home or in aftercare. But by 2nd grade, they want/need time with peers, and their peers aren’t at home or aftercare. They are in activities. You also start to worry about the sedentary nature of school, or the fact that a lot of the stuff you had in elementary (I had PE, chorus, and violin, all as part of the curriculum and chorus and PE were year round and pretty robust programs) is no longer funded to that degree in many schools. It gets shifted into after school programming because the school day has to focus on academics in order to keep test scores high.

So much of this is less in your control than you think. The system is now focused toward more activities. You can fight the system and get some time back. But there will be a cost for your kids, and it may not be an easy one.[/quote]

NP and mom of three (11, 9, 7) - the focus on activities varies enormously by school/area, often related to SES.  My kids’ peers are mostly still in aftercare, so it gives them active time and friend time.  There are options for afterschool activities, too - sports, art, music, programming, etc, again with peers.  And plenty of kids in elementary do go home after school, or hang out with friends or whatever.

Developmentally, it’s helpful for kids to be exposed to different things and new people.  But there are SO many ways to do that beyond activities with rigid schedules.  Mostly, people who’ve bought into that culture, around youth sports especially, think there’s no other way, but there is.  You may choose otherwise, but thinking that you MUST enroll your kids in sports, music, etc. or doom will befall them is… not accurate.

Much of our family life revolves around our kids, but DH and I are clear that we have other priorities, too: our work (which pays the bills), daily exercise for both of us (an hour, nothing crazy, but important for our health), family meal time.  [/quote]

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