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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Beyond what others have already said -

I noticed a significant improvement in my stress level when I donated a ton of things. We were always behind on laundry because we had too many clothes. Now we need to do laundry more often but there’s less of it. We also instituted that every person’s laundry is done separately. Of course, you have to help your daughter for now but start to set it up for her to be independent in the future. My kids start doing their own laundry at 8. You do your own laundry. DH has to do his own. So, even if you get behind on folding, a basket includes all one person’s clothes. (And when it’s just one person’s clothes, it takes much less time to fold and put away.)

We used to have our cleaners fold for us but sometimes we would not put away (I know, we are lame but sometimes it all does feel overwhelming). I find the sometimes unfolded but organized by person easier to manage. I also don’t lose my things, which used to happen when it was a jumble.

DH should commit to one evening a week when he is in charge of DD’s activities. Anyone can manage this - either he’s important enough to do that (emergencies notwithstanding) or he’s misrepresenting his role. I have worked with very high level people who say, don’t bother me on Wednesdays 5-8. Maybe once every 6 months we needed to, but not regularly.

TLDR: Go minimalistic and separate by person. Make your husband do a bit more. Good luck. [/quote]

OP here. Great advice. I love to donate things. I'm really active in our Buy Nothing Group. I only do my laundry and DC's so that helps.

DH does pickup from an activity 1x a week, that's really all he can commit to (he's working with people in different time zones, so our 5pm is their 3pm and the work day is not over. Pickup isn't the problem though. Getting DC there is the issue.[/quote]

I would say he needs to leave work early one day a week. If he’s working late other days and providing value, it really should be ok. It’s hard setting those boundaries but people will adjust if he does.

Also, would echo another poster. Evaluate how much you like your job. You may be able to find something that pays the same but is less hectic. I would not have been ok with compromising in my career a few years ago, but honestly, now I could not care less. I have a good rep and if you were looking in, you would not think I was leaning out. But the particular job was chosen because it’s more flexible not because it’s more stimulating. [/quote]

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