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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This is the unfortunate part of military life. I did it, and things definitely got more lonely in the final stretch to retirement.

I’d start looking for opportunities to engage inside the civilian community. Book clubs, yoga classes, whatever. You need a network without a power dynamic. [/quote]

+1.

What happened to you, OP, is rude and unfortunate. I’d feel disappointed too, especially as you’d been looking forward to the party and your family sacrificed spending the day together so your DH could cover. Maybe it is a capacity thing, particularly if it’s held at a venue that has a stricter headcount or people pay a landing fee to attend. I can assure you that the entire unit isn’t in on this or anything; it’s more than likely one or two people who made a dumb/rude decision.

All that said, I’m with PP and can commiserate that is is lonely at the top. My spouse is the boss and while I have made good connections where we are currently stationed, I sometimes wonder if some people are being friendly because they want to be or feel like they need to be. Social occasions can get dicey too regarding fraternization, and the bottom line you don’t want to let loose in front of your boss as much as your boss doesn’t want to let loose in front of subordinates. We always first to leave the military ball, holiday party, or First Friday at the club for this reason. Funnel your energies into making contacts among peers (if possible) or with civilians. The rules around socializing amongst ranks are so rigid that unless it’s on equal or almost equal footing t is often easiest and best to stick to non-mil socializing when in command or, say, at flag level. [/quote]

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