Reply to How many parents still financially support their middle age adult children?

Forum Index » Adult Children

Reply to "How many parents still financially support their middle age adult children?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Yep, my friend readily admits in-laws purchased their home, pay for kids private school tuition, take them on annual vacations abroad, pay for kids summer camps, plan to pay for kids college, give them weekly $ for dinners out, and even let them use their Netllix/Apple TV passwords, etc. My friend is a SAHM and husband is a fed. There is no way they could afford their lifestyle on their income alone. I think there are a lot of families in the DMV like this.[/quote]

I would feel "owned" if my parents did this. No thanks. [/quote]

Not all parents give gifts with "strings attached". We are wealthy, my kids will get gifts as we think they need.  As long as they get educated, work hard (no "I'm only going to work 15 hours/week and let you pay for everything") we will assist with extras.  Thankfully they grew up not realizing we had money (and we didn't until last decade), and even then we are frugal with alot of stuff (think we both drive 10+ year old cars because they still work just fine, we don't fly business all the time, only when price is not too much more, etc. )--basically they were still raised with a value of money and don't just get everything they want.  Thankfully they want to function without much help from us---so we gift the extras.  They don't want to just get handouts from us, they work hard but know we are always there to help if needed.  It also means they are a bit frugal (one more so than the other).  [/quote]

Examples of strings:

“my kids will get gifts as we think they need”
“As long as they get educated, work hard “
[/quote]

Not really strings. Strings are "you will become a doctor or a lawyer or major in CS or we won't give you any money and you must live in our hometown or no more money"
 We just expect our young adults to be contributing members of society and functioning on their own, so that the money we gift is a perk, but not "needed" for basic living.  I'm not buying my 25yo an $80K sports car, but I will make sure they always have a safe $25-30K decent vehicle to drive (if they need assistance to get one).

It's our money, we can choose what to do with it.  If we want to gift a trip to Hawaii we will.  If we don't we wont.  No strings attached to that.

Yes, the "get educated/work hard" might seem like strings to you, but it's really not.  We just refuse to fund lazy grown ass adults who have no reason not to work.  We value education in our household.  Kids are in/thru college.  But if one wanted to take the HVAC/plumbing route, we would be fine with that too.  But I sure as hell am not paying for everything for my 25 yo if they refuse to get a job (and are perfectly healthy, physically and mentally).  Basically they need to have a plan for life.  It would be doing them a huge disservice to just give them $100K/year and let them sit at home playing video games and drinking all day.  When you are rich, you are free to do that, but I don't really recommend it (and certainly don't want to meet your kids if you do that for them).

I think you are just jealous and stirring the pot :-)

[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics