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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Hi OP - and hugs; I think you sound like a supportive and kind friend.  I not get why so much hate is directed your way in this thread.

Maybe some of the people hating on you in this thread need education on their innate gender-biases? (they do not seem to recognize it).

Or if they are aware of innate gender bias, they need to work on that.[/quote]

OP here.

We were housemates in college and in the same program. Twenty years later we find ourselves living in the same city. I've known them as a couple since they got married. Our kids are friends, which is why I've been to his house since they've been divorced.

Don't worry about the "hate." It's clear that this question has brought out a lot of projection from some very women very bitter about their own situation. There do seem to be a fair number of women invested in the narrative of the lazy, incompetent dad. I mean, that whole thing of "dad as a clueless idiot" is reinforced in popular media, so it's hardly surprising, even if it's some universal truth.

As to the quesiton about money, I don't know for sure but they earned roughly the same, so I'd be surprised if there was some huge disparity.

I don't think there was any cheating. At least, she didn't confess anything to me or complain that he strayed. It just sounds like one of these things where maybe she had had it. But maybe she is realizing she didn't have it so bad.

I'll just keep directing her to a therapist. [/quote]

You don’t believe your friend when she says the division of labor was unfair, you don’t believe women on DCUM posting their division of labor is unfair, you don’t believe the multiple research studies that show the division of labor is unfair …

sounds like someone is projecting, and it ain’t us!

stay away from her. you are no “friend.”[/quote]

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