Reply to Are you envious of your friends and neighbors who have local and super-involved grandparents?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My parents live close and are super involved since they're retired. I'm actually embarrassed by it! Like people assume I have all this childcare so I should be more active than I am in the school, work etc. Or I always feel left out of the nanny/babysitter/after care conversations. But maybe it is just in my head. Anyhow, interesting to hear another perspective.  [/quote]

Hahahaha, good one, PP, you almost had me for a second! 😂🤣[/quote]

I do judge the parents of the kid who is always dropped off at school or soccer by their grandparents and never fully in school uniform or missing jersey/shin guards/cleats/all 3. I judge them because the grandparents look tired and are constantly giving the parents “date weekends” in Italy, Hawaii, Turks and Caicos, etc. I wouldn’t judge you for not volunteering or not working overtime.

I think people only judge if you have a million extra adults in your orbit but still can’t manage the basics and/or burden the community with them. Otherwise, I’m envious of your local grandparents but also super happy to have them around! They’re usually warm and friendly and have great, calming advice. [/quote]

Is this common? I don’t live in DC but, where I live, people who can’t afford a lot of extra childcare aren’t jetting all over the world and people who can afford this can also afford quality childcare in instances when grandparents don’t want to step in [/quote]

+1. I am well below the income level needed to jet off to the Caribbean for a weekend, but I have my childcare buttoned up. Grandparents are there to spend quality time when and as they wish. It’s a matter of pride in being able to afford my own lifestyle.[/quote]

“Afford my lifestyle” apparently means, for you, money can buy anything. Which is super weird when you’re talking about your own children. I have exactly one set of grandparents and a close cousin and her family that I’d feel comfortable leaving my young children with for multiple overnights in a row. Has nothing to do with money- we could definitely “afford” to pay a babysitter to stay overnight, but never would. Assuming that people who use family as childcare in these situations do so because they’re poor is…laughable. [/quote]

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