Reply to African-American parents - where are your kids in school and how are they doing?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What a great thread, I can't believe I missed it months ago!

Thank you to the ladies who shared their experience (and their child's experience) being the 'only' in class.  On the flip side, I went to a diverse high school with kids from primarily middle/lower income families.  On paper, the school resembled the United Nations.  Within the classrooms it was a different story.  The honors/AP classes had 2 or 3 black students [b](all girls)[/b] per grade, so if you were on this track, you still had a high probability of being the only black student in the classroom.

As I'm sure you can guess, this introduces yet another set of complications.  I didn't really relate to the white kids, yet I wasn't black enough for the black kids.   When I was a sophomore, I remember pretending to dumb myself down just so I could fit in with a particular group of girls (luckily my mother quickly put a stop to that)  I really didn't feel comfortable in my own skin until I went away to college (also an HBCU!)

My DC is only a toddler, so we have a few years before we have to make any big decisions.  I don't want him to be the only black student in his class, but I'll be damned before he wastes his potential to impress his peers.  If I had a daughter, I think I would be more inclined to choose diversity over academics….but it seems so easy for boys to lose focus, I'm hesitant to take that risk with my son.  I wish I had a solution for you ladies….best of luck.  [/quote]

This brings up another sad point, it is the girls who do better academically. I have some friends who see nothing wrong with their AA sons doing poorly in school, but I be darned, the daughters are planning on becoming vets and dentists. WHO are these girls supposed to marry. I have made it my mission to make sure that my son turns out to be "eligible" and does not become someone's burden. 
My kids are biracial and we live in a predominantly white area. I am not going to look for minority schools since practically all of their out of school friends are of color. Also, this is where we live and that is that. I take no excuses from DS, he has to be competitive academically. Nice thing is that most of the other AA families in his school also make huge demands of their sons. [/quote]

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