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[quote=Anonymous]I think you and your DH should reconsider “not bothering” the couple over this.  If they’re keeping the wedding small, to family only, they shouldn’t be so oblivious to and inconsiderate of the entire family’s means to the point where everyone is looking to you and your DH to pay for it all!  If you have to pay for it all, you should have some say.

Ask them to consider having a small wedding locally so the family can attend without going broke.  You and your DH can offer to host a family-only reception for them at a nice restaurant as your gift to them.  It should cost you less than the cost of your travel would.

They can still fly off to the resort for their honeymoon, at their own expense, as planned.  Make it clear that the local reception would be limited to immediate family only so they don’t expand the guest list.  It might be more palatable to them if you can suggest some nice venue options here before you have that discussion, maybe with a similar ambiance to their destination.

And if they decide they still want that resort wedding, then just send DH’s parents.  [/quote]

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