Reply to If you come from a FUNCTIONAL family, why resent/dislike people from dysfunctional families?

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Reply to "If you come from a FUNCTIONAL family, why resent/dislike people from dysfunctional families?"

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[quote=Anonymous]Op my experience has been that if someone hasn't had that experience they sometimes simply can't understand or empathise.  Everything is good with them so they simply think it should be easy until it isn't.  I have seen these types further down the road when they have had issues and then they get it.

My inlaws would say negative comments about the issues in my family, looking down on me.  Family is everything, blah blah blah.  Now one of the sons and 4 grandchildren don't talk to them.  The comments have stopped.

Family friend use to say to my DH, how could you not talk to your brother, he is family.  Now two of his sisters refuse to talk to him and are estranged and now he says "oh I get how you don't talk to him, it can be hard".

Friend said to me years ago "how can you have issues with your mother".  Years later friend had a falling out with her own mother and she is completely estranged from her and won't let her mother around her children.  She just had a 4th child and her mother hasn't met her.

I could give more stories.  Point being all these people were judgemental and didn't have the capacity to understand until a situation hit them, completely unexpected. Their family was all close prior to this happening.  This is life, sometimes things go wrong.  Whereas my relationships have now healed, theirs have crumbled but I don't dismiss their situation, I get it.  I think it's one of those things you have to go through to understand.  Some people are good with empathy but not everyone.  Also as life goes on you see that everything moves like a wave, it will be good only for so long and then something happens.  Any one that looks down on others for a tough time, is in for a shock.[/quote]

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