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Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
Reply to "How to marry a financially compatible man?"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am a woman in early 40s, recently divorced. Not looking to remarry immediately, I just date. But if I was to remarry, it would need to be someone "financially compatible". I have a net worth if $3.5mm (primarily real estate trust-like managed arrangement). No financial obligations except for a very small mortgage (net worth counted after mortgage). My trust makes around 250k/year. I also work full time at a fed contractor making 100K/year at a contracting position. I am not particular career oriented as I already make enough for single lifestyle. Basically it's like having 2 jobs with gross total income 300-350k depending on a year. Ideally I need my future husband in a 300K+ income bracket, to "restore" the lifestyle I had prior to my divorce. I had a comfortable income with exH at 700-$1mm/year. I like traveling to Europe, skiing, nice clothing, restaurants etc. I would want to mix the income which has to be roughly equal, without mixing our pre-marital assets. That way we both could step up our joint lifestyle and afford more as a couple plus benefit on joint taxes (every economist knows "economy of scale" principle). Of course, we could buy another joint property or start some joint business in real estate which I am very familiar with My partner would need to have a similar life style: e.g. not being cheap, willing to mix incomes but not assets, like art in other words being accustomed to this lifestyle. I can't imagine arguing about things which I can somewhat afford myself already. I am a member of a country club (where everyone seems married); a sport club, travel every season for 2 weeks on average; go out to nice restaurants. Is it realistic to find a partner like this? How would I "weed out" those under the parameters I am looking for? Are there dating platforms for wealthier people? I am not on any app at the moment, would it be a poor taste to put the requirements on the profile? [/quote] It’s not impossible. Look at Lauren Sanchez, she’s 52, dating Bezos, and they seem to be living an extravagant lifestyle together. He could have easily gone for a 24 year old but chose her. I don’t think you should put your requirements for wealth on profiles, that’s a big turn off. Instead focus on the positives of that - the traveling, art galleries, whatever else you are into that indicates wealth. Then look for the same on men’s profiles. You might be better off with a matchmaking service. Still use the apps, but try a matchmaker specifically for wealthy people. [/quote] OP here, this is the first post that's indeed helpful! Can you recommend a matchmaker? I have pretty wide social circle locally, don't want people to see my online profile. I have Linkedin but no IS and my FB is barely active[/quote] I don’t have a recommendation for a math maker, sorry. I’m sure there’s plenty online. What I would do: back when I was 24 and wanted to break into a specific field that’s very hard to get into, I spend 2 years actively pursuing it. Most people sent out hundreds of applications and resumes, got rejected every time, then gave up. I was very strategic, I did a ton of work to boost my resume, read everything I could online about getting in, did a ton of networking, met all the key players in the field, etc. and not only did a land a job, I landed one of the highest paying ones. I feel like your circumstances would benefit from a similar approach. Most people are very passive: like the people who just sent out applications, they just sign up for OLD then complain no one is interested. Instead, make yourself irresistible. Hit the gym like it’s your job, hire a stylist to help with your look, get Botox, learn makeup, etc. Then get out there and network nonstop. Go to where these men are - the art galleries, vacation spots, classes, events, etc. It’ll take you awhile to find all the right spots, but keep going and you’ll find them. Plan on spending 2 years working at this as if it were a job. Track what is successful and what is not successful. Expand your network by talking to literally everyone you meet. It sounds like a lot of work, but it’s not that much considering an extra $500k a year for the next 40 years. I know people like to sh!t on older women for not being desirable or whatever, but I think that’s crap. We make our own successes and can reach our own goals, but we have to work for it. Don’t let people try to limit you based on your sex and age. [/quote] OP here. I am a pretty good looking woman, and already dress stylish, make-up etc. My exH married me among other things for superior looks. Two friends of mine re-married in their 40s. Both from Eastern Europe, tall, thin and very beautiful faces divorced women. Both with teenagers. One is marrying a Silicone valley rising star soon, and is herself a successful multi-million business owner. He is slightly younger btw but they plan to adopt or have another child. I know these are real stories based on my female friends' experience, but I just recently divorced and don't know how to thread these new waters yet.[/quote] And under "very beautiful" faces I mean Lauren Sanchez types before her botox in her late 30-40s. Or a blond Charlize Theron type with perfect face. [/quote]
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