Reply to Therapy didn't change the household chores dynamic, so I...

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Therapy didn't change the household chores dynamic, so I... "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, what percentage of the income do you make?[/quote]

Not relevant. [/quote]

I am a SAHM. My DH is quite capable person for some domestic things - helping with the baby, cooking...ok these two things mainly. Despite all kinds of strategies - making lists, chore wheel, having meetings, texting, spreadsheets, to do lists -  he was not consistent in stepping up.  I hated that instead of being married adults, I took on the role of being a taskmaster. So I basically outsourced most things and I manage and supervise these people.

At the end of it all, I want for myself - a well run household, a good marriage, good health, happy family, kids who are enriched and thriving, being able to develop my own passions/hobbies/education, financial success, having time for family and friends, being able to withstand ups and downs of life and preparedness for all stages of life.  In this life, we all walk alone.   Chores are small potatoes.  Minimize your expenses on other things and spend the money on outsourcing.

However, remember that even with outsourcing, you will be the one in the supervisory role.   Accept that. Move on.  Men don't want to do the work at home?  Then they can step up and be excellent providers and basically shut up about how much we spend. [/quote]

You're a sahm. You should be doing the bulk of the household stuff as that's part of what you all claim is the bonus for you being at home.[/quote]

[b]I gave birth to our children.  My DH cannot create a human being[/b], so the least he can do is go and earn a big paycheck.  This I think makes up somewhat for his not having a uterus or being able to breastfeed.

Now lets talk about domestic chores.  I am raising children and looking after the home management.  I am not a maid.  He does not want to do domestic chores?  His desire is also valid. I am very understanding and egalitarian.  Newsflash -  I also don't like to do domestic chores. It is a waste of my time as a college educated mom, who can use my education for creating an enriching and educational enviornment for my kids.

And since both of us don't want to do domestic stuff and want to spend time doing more worthwhile things, I outsource a lot - from cleaning to laundry, food prep to yard maintainence, grocery shopping to handyman duties.   We both are happy.  Thank you very much.  There is no reason to be fighting about which spouse should be cleaning. I am gracious enough to manage the people who work for us.

Domestic chores is not a problem.  It is just an expense. It can be solved by spending $$$.

If you are too broke to spend money on outsourcing, then both partners need to work together to tackle household chores.   [/quote]

This is not an impressive accomplishment. You're ridiculous.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics