Reply to Couples who keep separate finances - how do you decide who pays when you go out to eat?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We have separate finances and split up who pays for what by category.  I provided a large down payment for the house and he paid the mortgage.  (Mortgage free for sometime now.)

Where it really has mattered is in investments as neither of us is a spendthrift.  Doing investments jointly would have been a nightmare.  He is an immigrant who believes in real estate and bank accounts and doesn't trust the stock market. I believe in equities and don't want to be bothered with real estate.  [b]Although we have made roughly the same amount over the years, my investments are worth double his.[/b][/quote]

And therein lies the problem:  they're not "yours" and "his."  They're shared assets.[/quote]

PP here.  Yes they are shared.  it's just that the performance of those I managed have outperformed that of the ones he manages.  We both have the same goal of leaving as much as we can for our kids and are transparent with each other on our investments.  I view our investments as complementary, but doing it separately has avoided arguments over what to invest in.  The only security investments he would have been comfortable with are U.S. Treasuries.  My 401k would have gone nowhere with that strategy.

I gave up my marital rights in his rental properties so he could put them in trust for our kids (so that is not really a shared asset).  He helps fund an LFIT I set up that has the kids as beneficiaries in the event of my death (actuarially, he is far more likely to die first). He is my beneficiary for my 401k and variable annuity.  We will both elect spousal rights on our pensions.  I fund long-term health care insurance for both of us.  We have double family health insurance through our two employers, which was a joint decision.[/quote]

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