Reply to Teachers, how do you tactfully refuse to write a recommendation letter?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I realize this post is addressed to teachers but parents are 👀. You should advise your kids how to go about approaching a rec and then requesting the letter. Best advice I gave mine was to email many teachers early before they're slammed at the start of the next school year. He emailed 5 in February of Junior year before winter break.

One teacher was an alumn at a university that was one of his top 3. It was an AP class and he had ~ 88 avg at the time. That teacher replied immediately with something like [i]oh hey bro, you're gonna love it there. Yes I got you.[/i] This teacher needed quite a few polite reminders! My kid felt like it was a bother to remind him, but I told him it shows tenacity.

Since all the other LOCs were uploaded, he met with the alumn teacher in Sept and asked if he could tailor the letter specifically for that one University. He did! He was last teacher to upload letter to Naviance. DS just finished his 1st year at that University. So I guess my point is to coach your kids how to request, follow up, and show gratitude. Letters don't have to be from teachers in classes with perfect grades. They need to think about the relationship. Letters should correlate to intended majors, if possible. Students should know their teachers. Mine didn't request from teachers he felt indifference for despite good GPA in their classes. Teachers also have favorites (it's a fact). Students are competing with their peers for letters and also applying to same schools. Keep that in mind. Many colleges allow and additional letter from other authorities such as internships, community service, or employers. [/quote]

I’m a teacher and I would be annoyed if a kid asked me for a recommendation in Feb for the following year. I would know immediately that the parent is behind the request. Asking in may or June is reasonable. Asking several months before the class is over is weird. Why would I commit to writing the letter before I know how the kid handles the next several months? [/quote]

At our MCPS hs, kids switch teachers mid year so wouldn’t February be the best time if you’re requesting from a fall semester teacher? Not a rhetorical question- interested in feedback either way.

Also, do teachers prefer to be asked in person or by email?

Thanks![/quote]

Definitely ask in person. And even if you switch mid-year, ask in May or June. Teachers are too harried in Feb to be thinking of recommendation letters. If possible, try to pick a teacher who has taught you for the full year. I have some kids who switch out mid year and I don’t know them as well as the kids who remain with me for the full year [/quote]

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