Reply to What is happening- drinking problem?

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "What is happening- drinking problem?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op here. Thank you for the helpful responses.

What is my next step here- I already found Al Anon meetings near us.

Do I confront him when he gets home from him work trip that I found this and he needs to get help?

Do I tell my in laws for support (I will be seeing them in the morning tomorrow without him)

Do I tell him now while he's gone that I found it

Do I leave the bottle and wait until I notice its gone[/quote]

I'm a DP and bumping this post in hopes "been there, done that" spouses can come back and advise OP on these detailed and important points. I don't feel qualified to answer these definitively other than to say that possibly Al-Anon could be a source for answers to these questions, if you can get to a meeting, online if needed, before he comes back. But do other PPs with real advice (and not just criticism of OP, or the useless "it's an affair!" parrots) want to help OP out with these? [/quote]

I would wait until he returns. I would talk to him before his parents. But, you also need to be really clear on where you are at. Is this “please stop and I will help you” or “please move out and get sober” or something else. I don’t think OP has wrapped her head around the seriousness of this yet at all. As someone who spent four years with an addict years ago, my response would be much firmer/harsher and would definitely include moving out ASAP. But I went through four years of hell long ago to get to that point. I also seriously wonder if his parents will ever be helpful. This crap runs in families fairly often along with the enablement.[/quote]

NP here - I agree with not telling his parents first/for support, especially in OP's situation.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't think OP has really had a sit down/confrontation over this with her husband.  I mean, she's photographing bottles and putting them back. Which leads me to your second point - how harsh to be? I think OP's husband at least deserves a chance to be honest and to make a change before bringing the hammer down, so to speak.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics