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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Of everything discussed and listed, imo as someone who works with high risk kids, it is this:

[b]  4. Modern parenting strategies[/b]

The #s 1, 2 and 3 of your list (the use of social media, the lack of socialization, and the inability of kids to flex) all comes down to poor parenting.  Modern parents aren't modeling these behaviors the way they should.[/quote]

Can you elaborate though? Because the main complaint I hear about modern parenting strategies is that it’s too involved, too child focused, too many activities, to many restrictions, etc. That parents are too involved, make things too easy, etc. But the other stuff on this list pretty much requires a highly involved approach. You are not restricting social media, getting your kids socializing more, if you aren’t highly involved. The societal pressure on kids is intense so I think many parents step in to try to create a buffer and allow their kids to have more of an extended childhood, but then get accused of coddling.

I think it’s really hard to parent right now, but especially teens. I also feel like the DMV feels like an especially bad environment for it. We’re looking at moving somewhere more rural possibly because it might enable a more safe and relaxed teenagerhood. But we don’t want them isolated. I just don’t know.[/quote]

Aren’t the indicators for sadness and direction pretty universally going up for teens, not just in the “helicopter” upper middle class kids, and across the country?  [/quote]

My friend runs a mindfulness program at Cumberland University, a rural school about 40 minutes outside of Nashville. Many kids are the first generation to go to college.  She sees a lot of what is described in the article and talks about the helicopter parenting and kids' inability to handle anything thrown at them because things have been handled for them. It's not just an UMC problem. [/quote]

Yep. We were learning to on board at life at 14. Today's kids feel helpless because their parents don't let them have any success at life when they are young.[/quote]
It’s the opposite…they don’t let kids fail.  And this sets kids up for being very scared of failure and feeling helpless when they go out into the world.[/quote]

I think this is true and that it's been happening for a while, and not just to kids. It's not just parents making it happen either. I don't know about other countries, but Americans are very uncomfortable with the concept of failure, or even the idea that you do something and be mediocre and have it still be worthwhile. We're an extremely success driven culture and there's intense pressure on young people not only to be successful in life but to do so on their first try, without much strife or challenge first. It's a weird and soulless approach to life that is more about bragging rights (being the first, the youngest, the best) than it is about living a rich and full life.

Failure, pain, suffering, disappointment... these aren't just unfortunate things that poor people have to deal with. They are necessary parts of the human experience. Without them life feels empty because it's hard to appreciate anything. Not just the victories but just the stuff of survival -- a good nights sleep, a pleasant meal with friends or family, good weather for your walk to work. People are so impatient and ungrateful, and I think it's because they are looking for perfection and don't understand that you won't find joy in perfection. You find it in appreciating life despite its many imperfections. So no imperfections, no failure, no mistakes... no joy.[/quote]

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