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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]After a week of so many rejections and waitlists, I'm finding it hard to make sense of it all and struggling to know the best way to help my DD. Brutal week.

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I am very sorry for your DD.  Rejections hurt.  And I'm sorry for you--it's the worst to watch your child struggle.

I am NOT an expert BUT as a mom of two kids who have dealt with the roller coaster of college admissions, my best advice as to how to help your DD:

1) validate her disappointment for a few days; it sucks when things you work hard for don't work out.

2) try to help her see that this is happening to many, many, hardworking, awesome, high-achieving kids...VERY few kids can beat the odds at these extremely tough-to-get-into schools. There will be amazing/talented kids just like her wherever she lands.

3) go to admissions day (if they have them) at the school(s) she has gotten into--these are so much better than regular pre-admissions tours because the schools really try to sell the kids AND they get to meet other admitted students...a lot of fun and it might just get her excited.

4) see if the admissions office from the schools she's into can hook her up with a student that is in the department she wants to major in and/or who is from her high school--making those personal connections may also get her excited.

It may be a bumpy couple of weeks but my guess is she'll be happy where she goes and she'll look back on this as a minor disappointment but one that put her on a very satisfying path.  Good luck to her.[/quote]

This is really good advice.  I would just add that saying "things always work out for the best" isn't quite the right tone; it suggests that there's some magic hand that will swoop down to make things right. 
 Instead, consider saying "I know you can make the best of this situation."  A kid who can learn to do that will have some really good tools in the box for the long haul of life.  [/quote]

I think both of those tones suggest you agree that they are ending up in a "less than" situation or that the current status is something bad that needs to be fixed or improved or dealt with. Instead of saying make lemonade out of lemons, I plan to extol the superior virtues of the lemon. It is an amazing and versatile fruit![/quote]

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