Reply to Can You Live A FulFilled Life Without Kids?

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Can You Live A FulFilled Life Without Kids? "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]Of course you can, op. The fact that you’re phrasing this question as you are makes me think you may want a kid more then you will admit.

People always seem to talk about the negtives with kids, and I don’t understand this.  It’s also possible to make homeownership and marriage sound terrible too.

Of course you’ll have hobbies and things you like if you are a healthy adult.  As I told one of my kids once “We weren’t just sitting around waiting for you to appear”. 
Think about it, you don’t have the kid lifestyle because you don’t have kids.. just like I don’t have a litter box because I don’t have a cat. If I ever do get a cat, I’ll get a litter box.

Kids are really no different.

I’ll agree with the poster who said you can create your own family culture with your kids. Watching someone else isn’t like having your own.

Think too about why you dread  teenager. Who do you associate with that makes you this anxious.  If you blame tv, remember every show needs a conflict and teens are a good source, they bring in ratings, young actresses and actors starting out can play teen roles easily. 
Ask yourself how you’d feel if your husband came home and said “I regret not having kids, I’ve found a woman who can/will, I’m leaving you”. Would you think “Glad it isn’t me, have fun sucker” or “If I’d known you’d want this, I’d have moved heaven and earth to do this”.

Of course you can’t change it if you regret having kids.  It’s also true that you cn’t change the past or any decision you make.  I lived in a house I truly hated.  I could move, but I can’t ever undo the memories or get the time back. I don’t dwell on it, I only say it to point out that “If you don’t like it, undo it” is a myth.

There is also a lot of leeway with kids. You can live in the city. You can live in the suburbs. You can live on a farm. You can dosports or not to sports. You can travel if you want.  You can homeschool if you don’t want to be bound by the school schedule.  You can volunteer. 
You will also be impacted by the kids you have. One of ours wants to do an activity that never appealed to me. I decided yesterday we’re going to do it, her desire is catching.  I have another kid in an activity that is really causing her to blossom, an activity I knew very little about until she joined.

Realize too that your 30’s will look very different from your 70’s.  My parents are in their 70’s, and it’s interesting to me how much we talk about the past. We’ll hear a song and go right back to an activity we did where that song was played.  My parents will see my kids or a picture of my kids and my dad will say “I remember when you did that”. 
People are right, you don’t want to have kids to wipe your behind when you’re 90, but maybe you’d like someone who shares memories and experiences with you? 
[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics