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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You really do sound like a good guy, OP.  Have you considered that maybe DW is having a hard time transitioning between thinking of herself as "mom" and "wife"? She may have lost herself in her identity as a mother and with that, her sex drive. You seem to have thought about this a lot, so maybe you've already tried, but things like date nights, etc., do you do that stuff? What opportunities does she have to be an adult woman?[/quote]

I'm not OP but I am a DW. He said his kids are 9 and 7. Pretty sure she should have made the transition to "mom" by now. Mom and wife are NOT mutually exclusive. You don't get a pass for struggling with your identity when you've been a mom for nearly a decade, come on. I hate this notion that women have to be coddled- constantly complimented, wooed, pursued to be made to feel attractive, yet also left alone for "me time" and "woman time" in order for her to be a contributing member of her marital relationship. NO. You get married, you say vows, which include forsaking all others. The implication being, you're forsaking them FOR ME. Not FOR NOTHING. Sorry, I think sex and intimacy in a marriage is each spouse's right. Women shouldn't have to have their feet kissed and all their changing whims met on a daily basis for their husbands to feel like they've "earned" sex. [/quote]

That's not what I'm saying. But, the OP's DW could have gotten emotionally stuck and may need to work through it. You obviously don't have a lot of compassion for that. [/quote]

Nope, not really. I have compassion for the people who are stuck in a lifeless marriage with these individuals who are happy to sit around and perpetrate the status quo upon their spouse because they're too lazy or unmotivated to make a change and don't care to because they know their husband/wife will stick around for the kids. [/quote]

I feel sorry for your spouse and family.[/quote]

LOL you go right ahead, but my husband's not the one posting on an anonymous message board about how I make him so miserable he'd be gone if it weren't for the kids. We have this neat thing known as "give and take" in our marriage. [/quote]

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