Reply to Can I quit my job or is that dumb

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Don’t quit your job. Your savings are too low to be comfortable. When you have several houses with your husband for $10mm or so then you can “retire”. I recently divorced in a similar situation. Was SAHM for 10 years, and went to $65k/year job. My exH quit his job just before divorce in order not to pay child support  and alimony. Thankfully we had assets and I got 2 rental properties $4mm worth that help a lot.
Your lost future earning capacity, retirement savings, loss of social circle would never be restored if you quit. Just find something less demanding and never rely on other people. Husbands come and leave all the time, particularly those who travel often…. [/quote]

Lucky my husband doesn’t travel I guess lol[/quote]

Smh...you sound like you've got the street sense of a 10 year old.  Good luck.[/quote]

This was a tongue in cheek response to someone who thinks you need $10m in the bank before anyone can even think of quitting.  I guess sarcasm doesn’t translate on the internet. Oh well. [/quote]

Not $10mm in a bank. $10mm worth hard to sell assets. All brokerage accounts, pensions etc can be dissipated in divorce. Only if I can expect that my 50% of marital assets is producing income equivalent to a $250k pension for life, I would quit. OP will only get $2mm in divorce based on their assets, minus legal expenses, minus college costs for 3 kids. She would sacrifice her own retirement savings and earning capacity of around $5mm. Just do the math!

Quitting for her is silly, she’s not that wealthy as an individual despite her spouse high salary. Their savings/net assets are pretty low eg not ready for retirement [/quote]

I certainly respect your position but I think this is probably extreme.  A 250k/year spend is relatively high for a whole family, you as an individual (since the husband would pay child support) could certainly survive and live well on less.  The husband in this scenario is not retiring - I agree that with only $4m saved someone needs to keep working but not necessarily both.  I also think only 2 kids, not 3 as noted here, although that is a minor point.  Again, if you need $10m to feel comfortable not working that is of course your prerogative but I think it’s on the very very conservative end.[/quote]

She said she would quit to have another baby so it would be 3 kids when she’s mid 40s. Not $250k/year to spend, but at least gross $250k/year to match her current personal income. She’s losing around $5mm in lifetime  personal retirement savings if you calculate the present value of annuity stream. This means the family has to save another $5mm to “make up” for that.
I am receiving $1300/month child support from my high earner exH. It’s based on kids needs not her need to maintain same lifestyle. With 50% custody it won’t be significant particular if exH fights it. For me it didn’t make sense to spend $150K in legal fees to get another $1k/month in support. Courts expect parent to go back to work and CS is to feed the kids; alimony is temporary, too.

Of course, she can now quit based on a verbal agreement with her spouse that all these financial goals would be met over the next few years but future it unpredictable. I would quit after my goals are met and I feel secure, not before. It happens all the time - pretty catastrophic, life changing events with SAHP mid life.

Never rely on other people, particular men. Love is not a written contract there are no guarantees and there are a lot of willing young women hunting for well-established wealthy men.

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