Reply to What is with DCUM women and "mental loads?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It's not new, and it's not exclusive to DCUM. Who in your household keeps track of birthdays, doctors appointments, clothing sizes, early dismissals, permission slips, camp signups, holiday cards, and meal planning? Does that person also have a paid job?[/quote]

I do all of this and have a paid job. It's not hard. Why do women seem to struggle with it?

-- Single Dad.

[/quote]

I was raised by a single dad. And while he was a good dad, and I love him, a LOT of things were missed. I missed tons of doctor's appointments, my teeth were a mess, I rarely got new clothes/new things until I was old enough to work and buy them myself, I could never do any after school or weekend activities because that would have been too much for him to handle, etc.

Was it the worst childhood ever? No. Did I turn out okay? I guess. I did go through a major depression as a teen, I think partially because I felt like he didn't care enough to do the basics. Ended up turning to boys as a source of male attention. I had to work through a lot of that resentment as a young adult. And I had to pay a lot of money in my 20s for dental work.[/quote]

This, plus people cut single dads a ton of slack because the mere fact that they are men parenting alone is viewed as heroic. Or even if people are annoyed/frustrated, he never knows because he is not tuned into that frequency. There is so much dads miss but they pay themselves on the back and don’t realize it, even if their kids suffer as a result, because they were not raised to think about a lot of stuff.[/quote]

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