Reply to Husband Not Being Supportive About Breastfeeding

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Stop complaining. He wants you to be happy. Nobody really cares if you breastfeed or not. [/quote]

OP cares, and that matters.

OP, I’m sorry you are struggling. I had a hard time with my first. My mom, MIL, DH and a few others were immediately like “Just go to formula” when what I wanted to do was talk through a few resources and things I wanted to try. I did introduce a bit of formula early on, but I really hated that they basically glared at me every time I attempted breastfeeding, even though it was what I wanted to do and was what made me feel closest to my baby.

Luckily, I have a cousin who said, “You know what, make sure the baby is fed, but even after a bottle, it can’t hurt to try the breast. Even a few sips will be a success.” And I did just that—I made sure the baby was fed, but I kept trying BF, and one day, we just really took off. I honestly did it in secret because any time I mentioned BF or someone knew I was trying, MIL and DH would disapprove and yammer on about JUST DO FORMULA. Well, I didn’t want to. And I will never forget coming downstairs after our first proper full feed with no issues, and telling DH, “No need to make a bottle—I fed her, and she’s full.” And she honestly looked milk-full and plump, and DH was happy for both of us.

At any rate, as long as you are first and foremost making sure that the baby is fed and happy and that you are well-rested and healthy, OP, you keep pursuing resources and doing what you want to meet this goal. Just know that DH doesn’t have to “get it,” and doesn’t have to listen to you complaining about it, when he’s already tried to help the situation, and you have unilaterally decided how this is going to go. You don’t get to complain about your decision when you will entertain no other options. I hope you get that.[/quote]

This is good advice, OP: make sure baby is properly fed, and keep researching and connecting with people who DO get it and who DO want to support you. Unfortunately, that means not discussing with DH any further unless you make a major change. [/quote]

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