Reply to SAHM-friend has NEVER once asked about my job

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "SAHM-friend has NEVER once asked about my job"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Let me see if I have this straight: so hearing about her dog or curtains or in-laws is fascinating, and my overseas trip to present ground-breaking science is boring.

And it is rude for her to inquire about the public facing part of my life, but not my retirement plans or medical history?

These "arguments" do not add up. [/quote]

Hearing about dogs and curtains and in-laws can definitely be fascinating and to me they are almost always interesting. I hate dogs but I love hearing what others' dogs do, I am always trying to figure out how to make my house look nicer and curtains are part of that, and in laws...when are they not interesting? I often get really into these conversations and part of that is I'm open-minded and choose to take an interest in what my friends are interested in.

I only ask about somebody's job when there is a lull in the conversation and I'm desperate for something to talk about. I know my husband sometimes doesn't want to talk about his job sometimes because it's stressful and he needs a break from thinking about it.

I do think it's odd to ask about medical history or retirement plans when somebody hasn't volunteered information about it. But if you want to talk about your job, just talk about your job! If you don't want to talk about curtains, politely change the subject! If you don't want to talk about your medical history, deflect! This is just social interaction 101. [/quote]

Also, I'm a SAHM with a loooong mommy gap. There was a time when I was really insecure about it because the reason I was a stay at home mom was because I couldn't find a job that paid enough to cover childcare. I was interested in others' jobs but I hated talking about how I didn't have a job because I sucked, so I didn't ask a lot about others' jobs unless I was comfortable enough to share my insecurities with them. My husband makes a lot of money and that almost made it worse, because I felt like I didn't deserve what I had because I hadn't earned it.

I have gotten over my insecurities, but being a SAHM can be kind of embarrassing, especially if you get the vibe that somebody is judging you for it. Luckily exactly zero of my friends and the vast majority of people I have interacted with look down on me for being a SHAM.

I feel bad for your friend, OP. I think you two not being friends would be for the best, but barring that, I hope you can be a little less judgmental. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics