Reply to Told brother to keep his girlfriend aka mistress at home for the holidays.

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Reply to "Told brother to keep his girlfriend aka mistress at home for the holidays."

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My DH was previously married. We met 2 years post divorce.
His family chose his exwife side during the divorce.
By the time I started dating him, exwife had a boyfriend as well and was pulling away from her exILs. Today, they have no interaction. 
Once we were married, ILs tried to cozy back up with their son. It was too late. They burned that bridge.
Be careful what you do, OP. I get that you like exwife, but she isn’t family.
[/quote]

I have a brother who is divorced and I was very close to my former SIL. She is family and always will be in my eyes even though they are divorced. Just because someone is blood doesn't automatically mean you should take their side or they they are in the right. [/quote]
Here’s the thing - with siblings, you can disagree with their actions and behaviors (affair, substance abuse, etc.) but you should still “have their back”. 
It’s fine to maintain a relationship with the exSIL. But choosing her side publicly and vocally and punishing the sibling will destroy whatever relationship you have with your sibling. [/quote]

Yeah but what about the relationship with OP's nieces/nephews?  They aren't talking to their dad and this acceptance could really hurt them.  Why do brother's feelings trump their feelings?  They are family too.[/quote]
But they aren’t going to be there. If they were, it’s a different discussion. [/quote]

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