Reply to Anyone have an affair and actually end up with that person?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Yes, but we met at the end of our marriages.  He was formally separated (and a total mess).  I was not yet formally separated but months away from it and the separation and divorce would have happened irrespective of DH because my ex is a horrible sociopath who brings darkness and depression with him wherever he goes.  Together almost 8 years, married 5, had a baby.  Marriage has its ups and downs but we're overall really happy.  I am definitely guarded in this marriage though, like I have accepted the fact that it could end at any moment and I know I'll be sad but okay if it does, which is liberating in a way, and also keeps him on his toes because he senses my willingness to leave if he screws up like he did in his first marriage.  I wouldn't trade the high points of the last 8 years together or our beautiful child for anything even if the marriage eventually implodes, so no regrets.  [/quote]

+1. Similar for me, too. I met someone towards the end of my marriage. He was still married, but started divorce process soon after we met. I would’ve left my ex regardless. He’s a horrible person, and I’m so happy to not be married to him any longer. DH was unhappy, and just coasting through his marriage. He knew he wasn’t happy, and was never going to be with his ex. Meeting me was just the motivation he needed to leave. Our married life is infinitely better than my last marriage. We enjoy each other’s company. We laugh, play, and like having regular sex with each other. DH tells our story truthfully. We met while both married to other people, both divorced, and now we’re happily together. I never feel like I’m wearing a scarlet letter. I don’t care about other people’s choice of mates, and I’ve found they really don’t care about mine. No regrets on my current life. [/quote]

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