Reply to 55 y.o. Female - no desire to date, what’s my problem

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Reply to "55 y.o. Female - no desire to date, what’s my problem"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am a woman in this age range and I completely disagree with most of the posters here.

I think having a companion and partner is one of the greatest joys of life, and definitely worth seeking. It doesn’t have to be a marriage, but the intimacy of a relationship with a man gives me so much more than the friendship that I have with women.

I think women’s declining libido is mostly related to their boredom with their spouse. The impact of menopause and sex drive is overrated, and closely related to women’s boredom.  I know many menopausal women who have active sex lives, and the ones who do are into their partners or dating.

Sex and intimacy with a partner is so, so much better than with yourself. Sorry it is just so much better than doing it solo.

Relationships bring a lot of disappointments and heartbreak. But they are also what make life living for. I have a lot of other things in my life, but I will always want a partner to share my life with.  I’ve been married for 25 years and these are some of my observations.

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You literally "disagree" with people because you have had the opposite experience from most women replying to this thread. Your empathy is missing, I think?  Did you think that your story about your good partner and good marriage would help explain how posters, who are single and divorced, feel? Or was just an excuse to brag? Weird. Yes, masturbation is different from sex. Its as different from sex with a new partner/dating in midlife, as your sex with your husband of 25 years is too, so lets not compare apples to apples when you urge women to feel like second class citizens for enjoying masturbating, as that just pushes shame and drives women back into bad relationships. [/quote]

+1 The PP's comment is not at all helpful. She has a completely different experience. And apparently, she can't imagine other people's lives. Of course she things relationships are worth living for!!! She has been happily married for 25 years!! However, for many women, relationships have brought awful consquences and were not fulfilling...which is something apparently she can't understand. She should not have posted. [/quote]

NP I do not understand why those prefer to alone have the sole voice of truth or authenticity.  
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She is not in a position to understand even remotely what it feels like to be in the situation of the OP, or single people in their 50s who are wondering about their desire to date. She's a happily married grandmother in her 60s. Might as well have the 20-year-old sorority girls chime in too, then?[/quote]

Maybe it helps to have the perspective of someone older who sees the benefit of a relationship, versus just all the bitter divorcees who show up in force on every thread?[/quote]

Why are you labeling divorcees bitter? They don't sound bitter. They sound happier without men in their life because it was not a good experience overall or worth it. They are not "bitter" because they don't see the value in a serious commitment with a man longterm or anymore. That is not being bitter. You just don't get it because you have not had their experience. They are not "bitter."[/quote]

Look at the quotes above! There are so many bitter comments to one post talking about the upside of romantic relationships later in life, posted by someone older than the OP. The angry reaction was totally ridiculous.[/quote]

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