Reply to "Walkaway Wife"

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Reply to ""Walkaway Wife""

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]dear OP/walk away wife
I'm a guy and feel like you could be my wife posting.
I liked the article you posted. I liked some of the respones you got here but was a bit disappointed to know that most of the responses were encouraging you to move on.

just thought of highlighting a para from the article. hope you read and reconsider:

But for so many women it’s “too little, too late,” or “I know this is not going to last. If I stay in this marriage, you will go back to your old shenanigans,” which, though completely understandable, is nonetheless tragic. That’s because, rather than feign “appropriate husband behavior,” most of these men sincerely undergo a personal transformation that shifts their priorities forever. They typically make great second husbands. Every time a near-walkaway wife or her husband enters my office, I’m determined to do what I can to open her heart and mind to see the profound changes in her man.[/quote]

I’m not OP but was in a similar marriage.

The fact that you’re “disappointed” and using excerpts from the article to guilt her shows you haven’t changed all that much.

Someone who truly did inner work would find it completely understandable for their wife to leave, and wouldn’t try to guilt them into staying.

And rarely do I see men truly change. It’s almost always an act. Mine did all this “personal transformation”, even had multiple therapists verify it for me. But when I decided to divorce anyway, he went right back to being the jerk he always was. True transformation would have been humbly accepting consequences for behavior.

You’re still thinking in terms of what is best for YOU. Not what is best for your wife. If the majority of people are telling her to leave, it’s probably in her best interest to leave. If you love her, you do what is best for her, not for you. [/quote]

Thank you, this comment was so off-putting. Im glad you left, and sorry for what you went though. [/quote]

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