Reply to Wrong to not allow my teen DD to wear certain clothes

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][b]We teach ours that trashy is trashy.[/b] The conversation did not start with our daughter, but with our son who decided that he wanted to wear tight white wifebeaters. For both shorts must cover the butt cheek and then some. Clothes must fit - I shouldn’t be able to see the outlines of private parts (again, mostly for son, whose sweats/shorts can be too tight - that one is just because he doesn’t toss too small clothes).

You can have standards, OP.[/quote]

How lovely of you. We teach our children not to make value judgments based on what clothes a person is Wearing. We also talk about why we don't like certain styles, but we don't use disparaging terminology to make our points.[/quote]

That’s very woke of you, but people make snap judgments on first impressions. They may not say something out loud, but they’re thinking it. [/quote]

Hon, I'm not sure that you understand what "woke" means. So just stop.

And frankly, [b]we do not cater to 3d party prejudices in our home.[/b] If someone is going to judge someone for their shorts and top, and think like a judgmental a-hole, they've given my kid a huge gift. And my kid has dodged a bullet.[/quote]

DP - That's fine and all, but your use of the word prejudices seems a bit dramatic. Human nature is what it is and people have internal biases. Full Stop. I personally would not hire someone who has full face tattoos. You can try and shame me for that all you want, but whatever. It doesn't mean I think they don't deserve the job, or are an awesome and interesting person, but I still would not choose to have them in a client- facing position in my industry.

I get you that you think you are empowering your kid, but do keep in mind that while they may have been given a "gift" there are absolute negative repercussions that can come with it. If having your own style is the hill you want your kid to die on, go ahead, but perceptions matter. If you don't get the job, the contract, get picked, given the chance, etc - call it whatever you want - because you want to wear what you want just be prepared for the consequences. You may not like it, but it is the way of the world.

People will judge you based on all kinds of things - some you can control, some you can't - and act accordingly. For Example: I personally have not hired a realtor based partially on the fact that they had bright, long rainbow hair. Its fine that she had it, it was actually not "offensive" to me, but it definitely made me look at her as not quite professional enough for my needs. Someone else may hire her BECAUSE of her hair and think she's super cool and hip. But my point is, she lost the sale for my home due to a perception I had based on how she presented herself. And I can assure you she didn't "dodge a bullet" by not having me as a client. Maybe not the best example, but it's the first one to spring to mind. I actually think the issue of *children* wearing skimpy or sexy clothing to highlight their bodies is a much more important and potentially troublesome issue... but you don't need a license to parent, so you do you.

[/quote]

That's a lot of words for what can be boiled down to: I'm a judgmental bi---. There are a lot of judgmental bi---es out there. So you should have your kid dress in a way to appease said judgmental bi---es.

No thank you. [/quote]

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