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College and University Discussion
Reply to "s/o this brutal admissions year"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Eh, do we really want our kids to absorb the message that the purpose of life is to work as hard as possible and get into the best college possible? That is joyless and not the life I want my kids to have. They can have a good life without conducting original scientific research at 16 or being the "best" or "top."[/quote] This. The problem is not kids doing the work. The problem is setting expectation so that they think their life is over if they don't get into the "top" school (however you define it). The problem is overprepping for SATs and making your kids take them again if they got a really good score but not a "great" score. The problem is pushing kids into activities they don't want to do "for college applications" and leaving them no time to pursue their own hobbies or interests The problem is telling them that a B is not good enough, even if it is the best they can do in a particular class. The problem is pushing our kids to become the person we think they should be (grades, college, career, etc) instead of letting them make their own choices and own them. It has been more than 10 years since "Race to Nowhere" came out, but things have not changed much if we are still having the same conversations.[/quote] This. 100% this! [/quote] It’s because more people are competing for fewer economic opportunities. We live in an economic system that is increasingly winner takes all. And I say this as someone who is pretty close to the top (can easily pay full freight for 3 kids) but still far from being able to opt out of the rat race completely (can’t buy our kids’ way into Harvard or give them 5M + trust funds).[/quote] I say this without rancor: If you can afford full freight for 3 kids, you ARE a winner. Because our society has become so immobile, your kids are highly likely to be fine whether they run the rat race or not. They don't need to go to Harvard to succeed in life. [b]You are one of the people guarding their spoils. You are one of the winners trying to take it all.[/b] [/quote] I am confused by the bolded assessment of PP. What would you do differently if you were in her shoes?[/quote] I would say that someone in this position is not, as she described "far from unable to opt out of the rat race." Her kids don't need to run the rat race and thinking that they do-- behaving and encouraging then to behave as if they do-- contributes to the toxicity of the general environment. Seriously. [/quote] LOL I see that you didn't actually answer the question posed to you. You wouldn't do anything differently because you are probably in the same boat or wish you were. Who is not going to pay for their kid to go to college just because other parents can't? A nutcase. [/quote]
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